With all the anniversary and wedding post on social media nowadays it seems that having no partner makes some of us feel left out. For many years I chose to be single even if that means third wheeling to my best friends, seating at the back of their partner’s car. People often tells me not to waste my precious time having fun and get boyfriend as fast as I can. As much as I want to think of that way, I always thought, “What’s the fun with that? Isn’t spending your days, weeks or even years to the wrong person is the actual waste of time?” Perhaps this belief came from reading fairytales when we were kids. We want to be the damsel in distress archetype; a princess who’s waiting for her prince in a white horse to save her. Sorry to disappoint you but life is not a fairytale. Alone is different from being lonely and I’ll tell you now that being single is not a bad thing at all, in fact it is actually awesome. Being single didn’t kill me and so do you.
STRONG SENSE OF SELF:
Once you have been in a long relationship and suffer from a bad break up, most people feel like they don’t have a choice but to look for someone that will make them complete again. However, there are so many future relationships that have been destroyed because of bringing unresolved issues from one relationship to the next. One could lose sight of who they really are when they start a close romantic relationship with another person; they try to define their identity to the other. Being alone is a unique opportunity to know ourselves such as our strengths and weaknesses. It will let you learn about skills and talents you may have forgotten or didn’t know exist. You will become independent, confident and knowing what you are capable of.
FINDING YOUR PASSION:
Singles have fewer distractions; in fact research suggests that people with no partner may enjoy their 9-5 work than couples do. My previous relationship made an enormous distraction in my life to the point of me almost failing my exams before. Being unattached with someone made me explore what I really want to do with my life. Pursue your passions because in order to become successful is to love what you do. Developing your career is so important especially in a younger age than having a romantic relationship.
We all have that one friend having amnesia for some reason and nowhere to be found because of her romantic escapades. The more we invest in enriching connections with other people, the happier and contented our life will be. Use this time to deepen your relationship with your friends and make unforgettable memories together.
Being single is not a curse or a failure; it allows us to be the best person we can be. When you start to love yourself, you will have this ability to know what your heart is telling you. Finding someone who will accept your flaws and love you the way you are can take months and years. Do not stress in finding someone, it will take time. Just be patient, you’ll know if he’s the right one. Embrace solitude and start your journey to self discovery. Travel alone; learn different cultures, idea and places. The best way to meet your Prince charming is when you have the confidence and the independence to stand on your own two feet rather than being a fragile confuse princess that needs saving.